Funnies from Red Fish

"I think I just turned four!  Can you check?  I'm pretty sure I just felt it!"

"My [New Fish] fell in the potty, but we DID NOT flush her down." (New Fish was sitting on the potty and she did accidentally fall in.)

"I hit my baby with the broom, but I didn't get her dead.  She just crying."

"Daddy movies are called baseball." (All sporting events are baseball in her eyes.  I find especially funny because Two Fish hates baseball.)

"I taking a good nap mommy so you go eat your cheese and crackers and wait for me."

I told the dog to be quiet and Red Fish said: "Why aren't you screaming mommy?  You need be mean at him like usual!  You say: 'Shush up puppy!  Come here!"  Gee....thanks!