Why I Have A Dog

This week my dog has been driving me insane. I have a hypersensitive dog and when I'm stressed, he is stressed. When there are changes in our house, he acts up. He steals, he chews on things, and he acts like a maniac. I'm already stressed from being pregnant and stopping several medications this week. Red Fish is frustrated with me because she is trying to talk to me and I can't understand all she wants to say. I'm frustrated because she screams. It's stressful. The dog was pushing me over the edge today.

Then tonight Blue Fish and Red Fish were sitting together on the floor and Red Fish was talking his ear off. Jabbering away in between kisses and hugs. She patted him and head butted him and he would give her a periodic lick in response. Red Fish tells her dog everything she can't tell me right now. He hears her and there is no frustration. Blue Fish is Red Fish's sibling. Her playmate, her confidant. This is why I have a dog. I need moments like this to remind me. His place in our family is important.

I have distinct memories of sitting in my backyard as young as three with my dog Beethoven and telling him everything that I cared about. Telling her she was my best friend in the whole world. There is nothing better than a dog raised with babies. A dog that is a part of the fabric of your childhood. That's what I'm working for. I want Red Fish to have what I had.

And let's face it grown ups sometimes need a little puppy love. Blue Fish was my baby when I needed a baby badly. He was a comfort during some of the deepest losses of my life. No matter how many times he drives me insane and I lose my temper, he loves me unconditionally. And at the end of the day he is a member of our family.

So deep breaths. I bought him some new bones to chew on. It's hard but it's worth it. I love that stupid dog.